I Want to Eat Your Pancreas
The day of Yamauchi Sakura’s funeral is dreary and cloudy, entirely at odds with the girl my classmate had been.
I imagine a great many tearful people are at her funeral, their numbers and tears proving her life meant something; but I’m not among them. I didn’t attend her wake last night, either. I’ve stayed home the entire time.
an occasion before or after a funeral when people gather to remember the dead person, traditionally held the night before the funeral to watch over the body before it is buried
One classmate in particular could have forced me to go,
but I guess I’m lucky she can’t, since she’s no longer in this world.
Neither my teachers nor her parents possess the authority or the personal duty to ask me to come. I’ve been able make my own decision and stick to it.
Seeing as I’m still in high school, I have to go to class
whether or not anyone asks me to.But she died during school
break, leaving nothing to force me out of the house and into the
gloomy weather.
It’s morning, and I see both my parents off to work.I
scrounge together a lunch before holing up in my room.If you
think I’m seeking solitude out of feelings of sadness or the
emptiness of loss,you’re mistaken.
I’ve always been the type to stay in my room,unless I had
to go to school,or my former classmate dragged me out into the
world.
When I’m here,I’m mostly reading books.I don’t care for
self-help or instructional stuff-novels are my escape of choice.I
like to lie in bed with my head on my white pillow and read my
books.Hardcovers are too heavy;I prefer pocket-sized
paperbacks.